Fruitcake!

We had to go to War-mart the other night (as my friend, Vicki, would say). One of the things we needed to pick up was some faux fruit to fill a black wire basket on our new kitchen table. I had seen the fruit there previously and knew it would work perfectly. First though, we had to pick up some hair mousse, which was near the front of the store. As always, dh was the task master, while I was busy talking his ear off. It's a gift.

He headed down the necessary aisle while I waited with the kids in the main walkway.
Returning a minute later, he said, "Look, buy one, get one. Now, let's go get the fruit."

Leading the way, he began walking again, while I, naturally, begin talking again.
"So the girls went to see that Renee Zellweger movie. Well, okay, so it's a Harry Connick Jr. movie too. Which, uh hem, doesn't have anything to do with why I wanted to see it too."
Anything much, that is.

When I stopped to inhale, dh said without skipping a beat,
"Where is this fruit? This way?"

"Uh huh. So, as I was saying,..." and I rambled on, not really aware of where we were heading at all, or even why. I was too busy doing what we women do best, annoy them with our incessant rambling, talking his ear off.

We were almost to the grocery end of the store when dh again asked, a bit more frustrated this time, "Are we headed in the right direction? Where is the fruit?"

Now frustrated with his apparent lack of interest in my story, coupled with his apparent inability to find the dang fruit, I grumbled, "It's this way, in the produce section."

SCRATCH! (enter DJ vinyl album sound effect)

He stopped abruptly, turned to face me and calmly said with a hint of surprise in his voice, "Not that fruit. The fake stuff you needed for our kitchen table. Where is thaaat fruit? The vegetables are clearly right here beside me, but where is the fake fruit?"

A slight pause (and slight chill in the air) followed by all out laughter. I stood there laughing like a mad woman. Yes siree, I was so busy talking that I actually went into auto pilot mode and tried to mindlessly lead dh to the produce section. Good thing this same "auto pilot" isn't responsible for getting us to Florida to catch a ship in two weeks, eh?

Toni